SMOKINCHOICES (and other musings)

Stop Smoking – Q/A

Jan and Heidie

Jan and Heidi

Q-   My husband quit smoking as of one month ago.  He never had another cigarette since that time (he was a pack a day smoker), but he says things don’t seem to be getting any better.  He feels nervous and disturbed all the time.  He has taken some B Vitamins and similar meds given  by his doctor, but doesn’t feel they help the nervous feeling and continuous thinking about a cigarette.  How long does it take for most people to get over this feeling?  Best regards,   MM

A-    MM, I  deeply sense what concern this must be to you.  It is hard watching someone you love go through this.  I offer encouragement to you  to hang in there and continue in patient loving.

As for husband, please understand I am not using magic or psychic anything here, only the experiences I have known them to be.  Since it is you who inquires for your husband, may I ask:   A) did he really want to quit or was it that he felt he should?   B) Did husband read the plan thru himself so that he could fully avail his efforts with the “tools” herein provided?  If not, I question that anything I say could have any value to him or you.  But, to answer your question as you have asked it:

Physiologically, the nicotine should have left his system after about 4 days time.  With some, a day or two more, but not a month.  So what is left?  We are probably dealing with the psychological issues which are every bit as dynamic as the physical part.  It is my opinion that the first few days are the hardest and most difficult to go through physically, but it is the psychological part which does people in;  erodes the will and weakens the effort.  Why would this be?  Usually because the person went into this lacking the commitment of personal desire and NEED to accomplish this, but instead may have been functioning from some form of pressure or coercion.  If this is the case, what is reflecting is a dichotomy of needs pressing for dominance;  the desire to smoke battling against the struggle to remain off nicotine.  This happens when one is not in agreement with the plan to quit, but thinks he should or is being ‘forced’ to, so rebellion settles in – the internal wars rage on. (I did this very thing over and over again thru years of effort with some good plans which all worked, but not for me).  First must be the commitment the decision to do this for self alone.  Nothing short of this will carry you far.

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Q-   A lot of people are having success with nicotine supplements and patches.  What do you have against them?   KL

A-   KL,  To each his own they say.  Whatever works for you.  This plan does not function that way.  The ultimate desire here is not to enrich some corporation’s bottom line;  not to find the power in some product, patch or pill – but in yourself which is far, far superior!   Also, by taking nicotine supplements of any kind, your time spent in trying to quit is lengthened to the degree that you keep using them.   Remember, even one puff on a cigarette calls up the demand again, triggers the whole dynamic of the body’s addiction.  Where is the advantage in that?    To exercise your own control through your personal dialogue which is an honest, tell it like it is sort of thing which brings immediate relief and growing pride is so much more beneficial.   Not to mention the practical “savings” for the monetary well-being in today’s  difficult financial climate.

Sorry KL, but I also question the use of the word “success”.  Lets see what that success looks like  – – long term.

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Q-  My husband quit cold turkey and he is saying that I should too, just do it.  Says I would if I was really serious.  I’ve tried, but it is so hard.  What advice can you give me?     Betty

A-   Betty,   your husband is to be admired.  He is right.  This is the way many, many people have quit.  Takes a whole lot of grit and teeth gnashing, but anyone can do it.   Many have to.    Why don’t you read thru this plan, be open, try to read not only the words, but between the lines as well.  Anyone can do this plan too, but it is not as painful to do and in the end ( a few weeks down the road) you wind up with a smile on your face and a great deal of pride.

There are many, many different ways to quit smoking.  This is one.  I know it works.  Cold turkey has been effective for many.  I did it several times.  It wasn’t my answer.  Cutting down from any amount to a lesser amount also is not an effective way.  Just one cigarette a day keeps that demand going and the urges plaguing.  This is fully covered in section 4.

As to how to help yourself “feel better” during the process, this is covered in segment 3. I must stress that Section 2 asks you to really look at all this and see it with new eyes. You are given the tools to develop your own CONTROL which leads to that self empowerment you seek.  I must have something here because there are those who have come to my blog and helped themselves to entire sections and placed it within their own plans (blog) as their own.  Tacky!

Good luck to you Betty.  What ever you do, do it for yourself, for that is the only way to be successful AND happy about it.

1 Comment »

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