SMOKINCHOICES (and other musings)

June 24, 2017

Apology here for 6-19-17 post

Filed under: Jan's apology for ugly messy post — Jan Turner @ 10:10 am

The Dr Roach post (June 19, 2017) was and is for me, a disaster.  You can’t understand, perhaps what I went through on this one.

My manner of working starts with the urge to express on a certain issue, theme or experience;  connect with this beast, Mini-Mac,  dig in and let  ‘er rip, almost non-stop.   Go  away and have a meal, break or whatever;   return for a read thru and then proceed to edit.  It’s like . . .is this really what I had in mind? . . .  does  it flow?  . . . make sense to me? . . . . overall spacing in balance? . . . kinda instinctual, actually.  Experience has taught me that I MUST save often (just automatic with me), even tho WORDPRESS says it saves  all automatically, hasn’t been my experience.    

Can’t begin to tell you what happened.  Worked on this post to correct and make it aesthetically pleasing to me.  But each time I saved and then viewed it, my work had been trashed, mashed and all  run together. It made no sense.  Re-did endlessly.  Finally, undone and exhausted (and losing even more of my mind), I gave in, baled and deleted it. Wouldn’t go away, so deleted again.  Still wouldn’t go away.  Copied and pasted into a 2nd newer, better life (the way I had meant it to be, saved again.  It was worse still.   Not happy with the  humongous  run-on, jumbled paragraphs with no spacing at all.  

Sent SOS to WORDPRESS for help as I used to do 9 years ago as a  beginner (have a 4″  3-ring binder filled with my how-to’s).  No help or response came even tho acknowledgement  was given, saying some member would respond.  Nonplussed, gave up, let it stand. But  this is not to say that it hasn’t dinged me profoundly.  I value harmony, rhythm, beauty, balance to the extent that it is difficult to breath without these elements in order to remain who I am.  

With allowing this post to stand  (couldn’t get rid of it!), I realize that  it is probably more confusing to readers than informative or helpful.  Mostly, the essence of what I said is reflected therein somehow — just not in a manner it was meant to be. Sorry.   Jan

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